Ship of Fools has been running a competition to find the Advent calendar with least to do with the actual Christmas story (that'll be 99% of them), and most likely to make the baby Jesus cry.
The winners have been announced, and you can find them here, if you can stand the combination of Barbie and Ann Summers. (Thankfully not one and the same).
Alternatively, get a Real Advent Calendar, which has fairtrade chocolate and an actual attempt to tell the Christmas story. Or if you live near Hove, pop down to the Beach Hut Advent Calendar for an alternative live version.