Saturday, November 29, 2014

After Black Friday

Having 'celebrated' Black Friday, here's a plan for the next 7 days:

What On Earth Did I Buy That For Saturday

Think about going to church to ask for forgiveness for elbowing a granny out of the way, but decide against it Sunday

Sorry You Were Out, Please Ring 666 101 Between 5am and 5.02am Yesterday To Arrange  Redelivery, Or Collect In Person From Our Office In Carlisle But Only If You Have 6 Different Forms of I.D And Even Then We'll Tell You One Of Them Isn't Valid So You'll Have To Come Back Another Day. Or Failing That We'll Just Leave the Package With a Neighbour, That One You Don't Get On With, Who'll 'Forget' to Tell You They've Got It Until It's Had 2 Days Rain and A Severe Frost Monday   (Also known as Cider Monday, for those in the West country. Actually, every Monday is a Cider Monday for those in the West country)

Red Bill Tuesday

Irregular Activity on Your Card, Transaction Has Not Been Processed Wednesday

I Completely Forgot About the Advent Calendar Thursday

And I Forgot The Flaming* Advent Candle Too, Now We've Got To Burn Through 4 Days In One Go But I'll Be Lucky If I Can Keep the Kids At the Table That Long Friday

I'm So Depressed I'd Better Go Shopping Again Saturday


*see what I did there?

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