Saturday, December 22, 2007

Cricket Quotes of the Year

Thanks to cricinfo, where you'll find plenty more....

"Who made them boring?"
Looking straight at the camera, a deadpan Richie Benaud responds to Geoff Boycott's call for four-day Tests because five days are, apparently, boring

"Is that Ranatunga? Strewth, he's not missed many lunches has he?"
Sky Sports' David Lloyd as the camera turns on a rather portly looking Arjuna Ranatunga in the stands at Kandy

"Oh, I do love those newspapers."
A sarcastic Ian Botham rubbishes newspaper reports about the impending rumours of Sanath Jayasuriya's retirement. Botham has been a regular columnist in the British press for more than two decades. Less than 24 hours later Jayasuriya confirmed the stories

"We are hoping to play New Zealand ... we are sure if we do not beat them, we can fight them."
Afghanistan coach Taj Malik causes palpitations in both the ICC and United Nations

"Yeh to Geoffrey Boycott ki maa bhi pakad leti". [Even Geoffrey Boycott's mum would have caught this.]
Atul Wassan gets innovative in describing the sitter Misbah-ul-Haq dropped in the slips, off Robin Uthappa

"I love the Boss range of grooming products and use Boss Skin refreshing face wash on a daily basis. When I'm playing cricket I apply Boss Skin Revitalizing moisturizer with SPF 15 to help protect against sun damage. At night I use the Boss Skin Moisture Gel."
Any ideas who Kevin Pietersen is promoting?

"Shane, with your, er, sorry Shane."
An unnamed reporter can't let go of Shane Warne's memory as he starts a question to Stuart MacGill ... who had just reached 200 Test wickets

"Sri Lanka cricket at this moment of time is not going in the direction it should be going, especially with a set of muppets headed by a joker."
Marvan Atapattu endears himself to his selectors as Sri Lanka struggle against Australia in Brisbane (as I post the Sri Lanka v England series has ended in a deserved 1-0 victory to Sri Lanka, and but for the weather it would have been 2-0)

"I have enough on my plate."
Mike Gatting referring to his new roles in English cricket. Few believed he would ever mutter such a comment where food was concerned

"I am handsome but all the actresses can wait."
A modest Sreesanth disappoints the beauties who can't wait to star opposite him

"We were at a warm-up game in Zimbabwe once and the fast bowlers were on with the old ball. I was standing at slip with Inzi next to me. We crouched down as you do when the bowlers were coming in. Four or five balls later, I noticed Inzi was still crouching and surprised, I asked him if everything was ok. He replied, "I'm fine, just trying to sleep. The ball is old and reversing so there's hardly a chance there will be any edges to snap up."
Aamer Sohail recounts a classic Inzamam-ul-Haq anecdote

"That was unplayable, just like the Spice Girls."
The new Shane Warne doll, a playmate for the Boonie doll, gets his sledges in gear

"That had four written all over it - until it got stuck in the rocks at long-off."
The commentary from the PA describes the unusual playing conditions for the Basra Ashes between the English and Australian military contingents stationed in Iraq

"If I was sitting in an armchair then I'd be disappointed as well."
Rahul Dravid with a message for armchair fans who were critical of his decision not to enforce the follow-on at The Oval

"He's not driving well, he's not hooking and pulling well. It doesn't leave too much."
Nasser Hussain hands Andrew Strauss a not-so-glowing endorsement

"I don't know all the rules, but I don't know all the rules of Quidditch either."
Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe on his conversion to cricket - he attended the Lord's Test on his 18th birthday this week.

"It was a waste of time. The boot camp was a different way to reinforce the same things. My way would have been to lock us all up in a pub."
Shane Warne gives his alternative to Australia's controversial boot camp last year

"Remember to say 'Good areas', 'Work hard', 'Keep it simple'."
What cliches? A mischievous journalist passes Monty Panesar a note ahead of a press conference. Panesar said it just once in 15 minutes.

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