Monday, February 13, 2012

Flying Spaghetti Monster banished by Planning Authority

In news that will come as a blow to atheists everywhere, the Flying Spaghetti Monster has made a public appearance. Sick and tired of being trundled out for the 10,000th time on Guardian threads and Dawkinsnet as a fictional deity, the FSM was briefly sighted in Chichester Cathedral recently, as the photo (right) reveals.

Unexpectedly translucent, the FSM was soon banished by the church planning authorities. This is a common occurence for anything combining church contents and imagination. Frank Field MP uttered the 2nd Subclause  of Power (the first is Health and Safety) and the vision promptly vanished.

In other planning news, a large LED display is to be erected above the stone bridge in the middle, which will show, live, the running costs of a wedding as it actually takes place. As each multiple of £100 is passed, a small bell will sound from the vestry, at £500 a chip and pin machine is passed to the father of the bride, at £750 all the lighting is switched off, and at £1000 the entire wedding party is forcibly ejected.

Credits: don't blame me, blame Alastair.