Bent out of shape

Sad to hear that Jonathan Trott is having another break from cricket, after a recurrence of his stress illness:

Stress and anxiety do not discriminate, however, and Trott appears to have decided that the man bent of out shape by cricket is not the man he wants to be. With a young family to consider, he seems to have come to the conclusion that on-field success in no longer worth the sacrifices required.

It's hard enough to come back from a public collapse, without having a running commentary in the media and paparazzi hiding in your bushes. 

The phrase 'bent out of shape' struck me. Public roles do that to people, sometimes your mental or physical health gets bent, sometimes it's your moral compass (politicians?), sometimes it's your judgement under pressure, sometimes it's not you but your family and the shape of their lives. I'm not sure if Trott's 'come to the conclusion that on-field success is no longer worth the sacrifices', or just found that he is no longer personally capable of making them at the moment. 

It sounds all too similar to what's happening to clergy - 
My husband is becoming bitter and demoralised. He is an incredibly gifted, spiritual man, but the reason he joined the church is becoming less and less clear, to him and to me

It wouldn't take long to name you a reasonable list of clergy (notably, mostly in their 40s and early 50s) who have burnt out, dropped out, been found out, or otherwise found the relentless pressure too much. I heard of a hard working vicar, younger than me, who was recently hospitalised with a suspected heart problem. In recent years a couple of local clergy have dropped out of active parish ministry (getting an undeserved scourging in the tabloids was a major factor in one case). I was in a meeting a few weeks ago, all dog collars, where I was the only one not on anti-depressants: an odd thing to hold against the fact that we have higher rates of job satisfaction than anyone else. 

Elsewhere in the diocese and the CofE some clergy have had to stand down after falling into sin. That's another way that people can respond to pressure. An 'Adam. and Ellie' moment perhaps isn't that far away for some of us. 

This shouldn't be a surprise, Christian faith is about carrying a cross, the world bends Jesus out of shape and it will do the same to us. But we can't simply shove this all in the box of 'suffering with Christ' - Trott has been bent out of shape by a combination of public pressure, his own high standards, and the relentless demands put upon him by international cricket. (Vicars: insert 'parish' for 'cricket') There's a sense that he has lost the joy of the game. It's 'for the joy set before him' that Jesus endures the cross. We need the joy to get through the Good Fridays. But scanning the battlefield around me, I'm now seriously asking the question of how I'll manage another 20 years of this without joining the casualty list at some stage. 

Vicar Burnout

A new survey of 3000 Anglican clergy reveals that nearly 1 in 5 of us feel 'burned out' at least once a month or more. The survey also states that this is 'not high when compared to other occupational groups" (p6). Well that explains a lot. If 18% of bankers, politicians, journalists, clergy, social workers, teachers, parents etc. are experiencing that much stress, it's no wonder we're surrounded by the fruits of ropey decisions.

Sam Norton has recently posted on the stats of church decline in the CofE. I hope the fact that we're experiencing similar levels of stress to everyone else doesn't lead the powers that be to go 'oh, that's alright then'. There are some serious structural problems with the CofE, and the jury is still out on whether the parish system is an effective neighbourhood mission strategy or a doddering sacred cow which needs to be put out of its misery before it topples over and crushes us.

Update: for some thoughts on where and when churches are effective in mission, try this (HT Thinking Anglicans)
"•If you want Christianity to shrink, give it wealth and privilege and back it up with the power of the state.

•If you want Christianity to show surprising resilience, suppress its structures and persecute its people.
•If you want Christianity to thrive, drop it into a free market environment and force it to hustle."

There, that was cheery! Merry Christmas everyone!!

Clergy Bullying 'rife'?

BBC report today on bullied clergy:

Workplace bullying of the clergy has become "rife", according to the union Unite which says priests are being picked on by bishops and parishioners.

The union has set up a hotline where the clergy can report abuse, and says it deals with up to 150 cases a year.

"Bishops have got a lot nastier", says the Reverend Gerry Barlow, chair of the faith workers branch of Unite. Unite says the bullying frequently comes from superiors within the church who may be under financial pressure.

"A bullying case can go on for a long time", says Terry Young, a former minister who runs the helpline. "They're picked on for everything they do wrong, so in the end the person runs around terrified. You see these people unsupported, driven into depression and a nervous breakdown."

There are roughly 8,000 stipendiary clergy, though I guess Unite covers the non-stipendiaries too. Over the last 10 years, roughly 250 per year have left the CofE payroll - some of this is movement to other posts (e.g. chaplaincies, Diocese of Europe, work with other agencies like CPAS), but without more detail it's impossible to know how many have quit through stress, who might otherwise have stayed with a better working environment.

This is a topic Bishop Alan has regularly covered, and he has plenty of good reflections on the nature of bullying, and what to do about it. It's an issue the CofE as a whole is alive to: the report Dignity At Work, published in June 2008, is a report on bullying and the clergy, with suggested policies and procedures for Dioceses who want to take it seriously. It would be interesting to know how many Dioceses now have such a policy in place.

At present there's nothing about this on the Unite website, and nothing else on the web, so I'm not quite sure where this story has come from. Given that Unite also covers clergy from non-Anglican churches, and from other faiths, so it's not clear if that 150 is just CofE clergy (in which case it's about 2% of clergy, which is pretty high) or of everyone covered by the union.

Back in the dim and distant past, when I worked for Clarks shoes, one or two people I was 'managing' ended up off with stress and physical ailments, mainly because I was so rubbish at my job. At the same time there were others who I found very intimidating, and was glad to get moved to a different placement after 6 months. The nature of power and authority is so muddled in the CofE that pretty much anyone could end up bullied by anyone else, if the personalities and situation conspire in that direction.

I can tick off in my mind several cases which might end up on this hotline, so it's good that it's there, but it would be even better if the support and love was there from the local and Diocesan community. Unfortunately, parishes are such sealed units that it's very difficult to pop 'over the fence' to offer support, and when you're down and being kicked, it's very difficult to ask for support in the first place.

For interest: Church Times online question about whether people were aware of bullying in their church. 80% of respondents (296 at time of writing) voted 'yes'.

And two questions:
1. how does anyone know that Bishops have 'got a lot nastier'? That's quite a brush to tar the men in purple with. Is the number of reported cases going up, or down? And if so, is that because the helpline is now better known, and the CofE itself is giving this issue a higher profile?

2. Financial pressure may mean that there are redundancies in the pipeline. This is probably a new situation for many dioceses. Redundancy is never great (unless you hated the job anyway), but Dioceses need to do some thinking about how they go about this. Voting through a job cut in Diocesan Synod with the post holder present and debating the point doesn't sound ideal. What's the alternative?

Update: interesting piece by Ruth Gledhill, links roundup at Sam Norton.

Grace Under Pressure?

“What a man is on his knees, that he is and nothing more.” (Robert Murray McCheyne)*

The Toothpaste Test: what comes out when the pressure is on? It’s easy to put on a facade when everything is fine, but there’s nothing like a tight squeeze for revealing what we’re really like:

- Gordon Brown has displayed a spectacular level of resilience (or desperation?). Both James Purnell and Caroline Flint may have thought they were delivering the ‘Geoffrey Howe moment’, but Brown has clung on. Most people would have ended up in the Priory after the sort of week he’s had. You have to admit his toughness, even if you’d rather he wasn’t there. I rather admire his dutiful refusal to give up and walk away.

- Caroline Flint’s resignation letter sadly comes across as a petulant response to not being promoted in the reshuffle, rather than a principled refusal to be ‘window dressing’. It reflects badly both on Brown, but also on Ms Flint herself.

- Brown has also displayed, again, his misjudgment of character. On one day Brown talks about his ‘Presbyterian conscience’, then the next he appoints Alan Sugar to a top government role. In one week, the PM has gone from Simon Cowell to Alan Sugar: you wonder if he put together his Cabinet by browsing the Radio Times.

As the public clamours for honest MPs in the wake of the expenses scandal, Sugar is a man who awarded the Apprentice crown last year to a man who was found out for lying in his CV. His public persona is a mixture of grouchiness and greed - you might argue that this is only a persona, but frankly I’m sick and tired of people who put on an act for the cameras, but behave differently in private. Dizzy also notes that Sugar has a bit of history with Gordon Brown.

Squeezing Dave
For an observer, its certainly been an exciting few days, but I’m glad Brown is staying. Why? Because his rivals haven’t yet had the Toothpaste Test. We don’t really know what David Cameron is like under pressure. The Tories have floated to the top of the polls without, as yet, serious scrutiny of their policies, their character, or their principles. Cameron’s calls for an election have been irresponsible - how can we possibly have a sensible election in the midst of the current mess? What kind of mandate would it give to whoever won?

Britain’s Got Talent reminded us that the spotlight can reveal our frailties, as well as our gifts (and whilst we’re on the subject, any show that hospitalises its contestants needs to be taken off air, no matter how popular it is). Brown used to have a reputation for rising to challenges - remember summer 2007? In a years time his response to the economic crisis may be judged more kindly too, as we remember that the Conservatives failed in their Opposition duty to blow the whistle on a debt-fuelled boom.

The media seems to enjoy bringing people to its knees - Tony Blair once famously called them a pack of feral beasts. There’s a fine line to tread between vigorous scrutiny, and respecting the human dignity of those you are calling to account. Brown needs to be given the chance to stand up and get on with his job.

Meanwhile I wouldn’t want to see Cameron brought to his knees, but I still don’t believe we’ve really seen him tested, and that worries me.

*The full quote is “What a man is on his knees before God, that he is and nothing more.” McCheyne was a missionary, but I’m not sure if he was a Presbyterian. By way of contrast, I'm currently reading a biography of the missionary Hudson Taylor, and one thing which stands out is his constancy of character, rooted in prayer and dependence on God.

This is a cross-post from 'Touching Base', a weekly column hosted at the Wardman Wire.

Review Questions 3 - RPM's

Another resource from Arrow is the idea of watching personal RPM's in 4 key areas, the idea being to make sure you don't get into the 'red zone', or at least if you do, it's possible to take stock and get out of it again. Being in the red zone in 1 of the 4 areas is tricky, being there in 2, 3, or 4 is dangerous.

For each area there's a simple list of symptoms, what the 'red zone' might look like, to which you can add a few of your own: everyone has their own symptoms for what happens when they get overtired, or shut off emotionally.

Physically

- stress targets a particular part of your body (migraines, back etc.)

- you become ill at the start of your holiday

- you take little exercise

- irregular sleep

Emotionally

- you don't have time to pay attention to feelings.

- more vulnerable to escapist sin (this is a way of subduing emotional needs by distracting yourself - pornography, alcohol, addictive behaviour etc.)

- you become dispassionate about the plight of suffering people

Relationally

- relationships become superficial

- you don't have time for friendships

- You spend more time with other people than with your partner

- you are always apologising to your children for not being there.

- you say to yourself it will get better in a few months, but it never does.

Spiritually

- prayer is reduced to cries for help

- worship is reduced to thanksgiving

- you begin to rationalise misbehaviour and sin

I use this roughly every 6-8 weeks, and its a good check on energy levels. There have been times when 3-4 of these were in the red zone, and guess what? I ended up with depression.

The list is deliberately simple, and doesn't spell out what you need to do to recover spiritual, mental, relational or emotional energy and health. After all, all the best warning signs are simple ones.

For more in this series, follow the 'review questions' label below.